Unlearning
B Y W I L L I A M F R A N K D I E D R I C H
OFTEN, THE ROLE OF A TEACHER, coach, or leader is to help people to unlearn. Most of us have learned so much stuff that either isn't true or that doesn't work. We each carry beliefs and assumptions about life that limit our ability to grow, to be effective at what we do, and to see life clearly. Our learning has created an illusory world that isn't as real as we might think. Therefore, our task, if we are to grow spiritually, is not to learn, but to unlearn.
In modern psychology and spirituality we have adopted the concept of ego. The ego is the false self. It is a group of thoughts you hold that thinks it is you. The motto of the ego, according to A Course in Miracles is: "Seek and do not find." The ego keeps us running from drama to drama. The ego keeps us from seeing our true Self, because it wants to maintain its control.
If you would consider these concepts for a moment, and step back from every day life that you call reality, something interesting begins to happen. You find that "reality" begins to fall apart upon close examination. We are surrounded by messages containing beliefs and "truths" that simply are not true.
An example of this is the concept of "race". Race is not real. It is a false construct that was invented about two hundred years ago in order to justify slavery. A pseudo science called "race science' was developed to give it credibility. Some "religious" leaders then interpreted certain stories from the Bible to give the concept a history. The Bible does not talk about race, only nations and tribes. Race was invented as a political tool to justify the unjustifiable, and to validate the positions of certain politicians of that time. Yet, many countries today, especially the United States, are very race conscious. Historically people have fought and died for a concept that is in reality, nonexistent. We do exhibit differences in thinking and behavior based on culture, history, and values, but race is not real.
In all of our debates about politics, religion, and money we often fail to question the assumptions underlying our views of reality.
What are your assumptions about your ability to get money? Do you feel that you deserve to have money? Is there a part of you that believes it is not okay to have money? Are you constantly afraid of losing the money you have? Do you resent people who have money? These underlying ideas influence your level of wealth, generosity, and how you treat other people when money is involved. If you don't have enough money, by all means get a job and earn enough to live. But if you really want to make progress, question the reality you have constructed around money. It is that reality which determines your prosperity, not the actions and decisions of other people. But don't believe me, test it for yourself.
In religious matters we assert our views with the underlying assumption that our image of God or the Universe is the right one.
True spiritual growth is beyond belief. Beliefs can become placeholders for what we don't really know. Having a set of beliefs does not give you an inside track to God. Often beliefs get in the way of understanding God. Prayer, contemplation, questioning one's life and purpose, rigorous self reflection, meditation, studying spiritual writings that seem to speak to you - these are the actions that help us to learn the truth. Unfortunately, most of the world is content to let "experts" tell them what to believe. "The unexamined life is not worth living," wrote Socrates. And as for all those experts out there telling you what to believe, the Taoists wrote: "He who knows does not speak; he who speaks does not know."
Today we live amidst a clash of realities - Republican versus Democrat; Christian versus Muslim; Palestinian verses Israeli; those who have versus those who do not. If you set aside your preferences and beliefs for a moment, and really examine the assumptions upon which each reality is built, you will find inconsistencies everywhere. No one's belief system is air tight, not yours and not mine. Are you willing to face your own inconsistencies? Are you willing to face your fears and look at life straight on? Begin by asking: "Who am I?" and don't fill in the blank with a belief.
What will come to you first is who you are not. You are not a manager, employee, dad, mom, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, American, European, African, Asian, good person, bad person, etc. These are roles that you play in life, and you are not your role. As you begin to shed your identity with roles you will find an unexpected gift. The gift is freedom. Freedom doesn't mean "I can do whatever I want." Freedom means I turn within for my guidance rather than letting the world (Maya) tell me what to think. Freedom means I place all of my trust in my Source (which I call "God") and live authentically. It means that I am not driven by my fears (ego), because I am free of the influence of fear. Freedom is a moment to moment decision.
The New Testament of the Bible offers the following: "But seek first God's Kingdom, and his righteousness;
When you step back from beliefs and shoulds and have-to's, you find there is a purpose and a flow to your life. There is a direction calling you. No one else can tell you what to do. The world is a tricky place, and Maya is seductive. It is easy to be drawn into dramas and conflicts which result in pain and suffering. It is easy to think that the perfect car, or the perfect home, the perfect partner, the right beer, the right self help book, and everything else the world tells you will be the source of your happiness. The idea that happiness or satisfaction is found "out there" needs to be unlearned. Things "out there" are useful and helpful, but they are not the source of well-being.
The problems we encounter in life are not as real as we might think. Pain certainly feels real, yet there are those who learn to transcend it. Fear can hold us in its grip, yet we can learn to let it go. A person may offend us, yet we can refuse to be offended. At one moment our finances may look bleak, and the next moment a brilliant idea, if acted upon, will bring us plenty. Perhaps the biggest untruth that we believe is the one that says we are victims of this world. Being a victim is a role you may play, but it is not who you are. Step back
In conclusion, there is one thing that you know for sure: "I am". As Descartes proclaimed, "I think, therefore I am." You are aware. What you choose to do with that awareness determines your life. Awareness in an ego context teaches us how to manipulate others. Awareness from a spiritual context has us asking; being silent, and listening for direction. This awareness has us depending on our spiritual intelligence rather than ego intelligence. Religious belief systems and spiritual paths are permeated with potholes into which we stumble. We think we are making great progress and all the while Maya is smiling. We think we are more spiritual than some other people, and the ego nods its approval of those thoughts. We think we are playing an important role in a great quest, but it's really just a dream. Certainly we can enjoy the dream, yet in order to do that we must become awake. We need to unlearn all that we think is true. To unlearn we must question everything we think is true. We must be willing to set it all aside and hear the still small voice within.
I leave you with this unlearning quote from A Course In Miracles:
Simply do this: Be still and lay aside all thoughts of what you are and what God is; all concepts you have learned about the world; all images you hold about yourself.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
William Frank Diedrich is a speaker, executive coach, and the author of three books and one CD. To learn more about his work go to:http://intelligentspirit.com or to http://noblaming.com. To comment on this article write to William at Bill@noblaming.com.
Permission to share freely as long as footer is included.
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